.002 [Video]

[what_ho_jeeves]

[FAIL!private to the Admiral. ie--not private at all]

Excuse me, Admiral fellow, if you could do a chap a favour, I'd like to trade in my current Warden Item for a new one. I'd like my new Warden Item to be a valet, tall, dark-haired, goes by the name of "Reginald Jeeves." I'm sure he'd do a corking job keeping me informed of my inmate-to-be's activities, as he's always kept me informed of dashed near everything that one could possibly need to be informed about. In fact, he's the most informed bird I know. "Informed" is just the word to describe him.

And I'd be bally grateful if you could make the replacement quickly. I've a yearning for a spot of tea, you see, and the kettle's a bit tricky.

Comments

[vinkus-witch.livejournal.com]

So you're ascribing a person with the quality of 'thingness', yet insisting he's not inhuman, but incredibly intelligent, yet his thingness means he can qualify as an item when people point out the fact that you're asking for a person to be your item?

[what_ho_jeeves]

[He's not quite sure what you're getting at here, but it sounds good enough.]

Er...yes?

[vinkus-witch.livejournal.com]

You are completely and utterly reprehensible.

[what_ho_jeeves]

[You've hurt Bertie's feelings...]

That's a bit much. I just want my valet.

Say, you aren't another one of those Red Dawn communists are you?

[vinkus-witch.livejournal.com]

I don't even know what that means. You want your valet to be your item, because you consider him a thing.

[what_ho_jeeves]

It means you irrationally don't like the bourgeoisie or aristocracy.

I don't want Jeeves because I think he's a thing, I want Jeeves because he's the only person able to keep the Wooster corpus out of the soup.

[vinkus-witch.livejournal.com]

I don't like anyone who sees themselves as better than others due to circumstances of birth regardless of class.

And...what?

[what_ho_jeeves]

Jeeves. Pulls me out of the soup. Saves my bacon.

[vinkus-witch.livejournal.com]

...do you often have such difficulties eating?

[what_ho_jeeves]

Not usually, no.

[vinkus-witch.livejournal.com]

Then why do you fall in your soup so often?

[what_ho_jeeves]

[Puzzled frown what this has to do with eating, then the light bulb goes on.]

Oh no, I don't literally fall in the soup. It's a meta...thing. Metaphor, that's the word. You see, I whenever I land myself into a spot of trouble, wholly against my will, I assure you, Jeeves gets me out again.

[vinkus-witch.livejournal.com]

I see...I don't think I quite understood any of this conversation.

[what_ho_jeeves]

To be honest, I'm not sure I did either.